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Tuesday, July 19, 2005

Uber-romantic Anniversary Getaway

So, how is this for romantic?

I booked 2 seats on the one and only SLC cruise liner. Its a small yacht that seats about 30 and they serve dinner while they cruise the Salt Lake. Sounds like a fun and romantic idea. And at only $40 per seat, its seems very reasonable.

Oh, it was soooo romantic - well, as long as you dont mind the puking stench of the Salt Lake. If thousands of tiny gnats dont bother you, you might still enjoy it. Oh, and the 4-6 huge disgusting spiders in each window really add to the effect. Well, at least they went all out on dinner, and had us serve ourselves from the worlds smallest buffet on paper plates and sit at tables with hideous plastic table cloths. They had 1 choice of salad and an eye-boggling 1 choice of dressing for it.

The entertainment was stupid. It was the worlds worst magician. Out of 10 tricks, I think there was 1 that I was unable to figure out. Plus his sense of humor was so dry, that by the time he was done telling jokes, all the was left of the lake was the salt. He handed me his card, I decided to hold on to it in case Im ever in a restroom that is out of toilet paper.

There was one HUGE bonus for us. We sat by the right couple, or more precisely, they sat by us. They were WONDERFUL. Just a good down to earth young couple. The wife was pregnant with their 2nd child. The husband is a website programmer and piano teacher. I am SOOOOOOOOO glad they sat by us. We almost ran the risk of sitting by the worlds most vain couple ever. The 48ish year old lady had a very large chest which she was unafraid to display (she even had it autographed by yet another one of this planets real winners). Her and her ear peirced, tatooed boyfriend got drunk and got loud and talked alot about breasts and other subjects of elevated intelligence. The lady had a very nice rubbery almost leathery tan amongst her already years-of-tan-abused skin. Her platinum died blond hair did however match her personality very well.

Yeah, next time I consider doing that, Ill spend my $40 to have someone kick me in the pants. It should be less painful.

BUT, we did book a room in the Armstrong Mansion in the middle of SLC somewhere. Its a very old building that they have themed out every room to match a month of the year. We stayed in September Woods and it was cool. Nice big fat jetted tub. When we returned from the Cruise of Insanity we were greeted with rose petals on the floor, candles lit around the room, choclates and apple cider in an ice bucket. So it was nice and calming.

Amy thought it would be a good idea to put bubble bath liquid into the jetted tub. Things were running along fine.... until we turned on the jets. You would think there is a mathematical formula to describe when X amount of bubble bath will cease to create bubbles. You would think that. Once the bubbles had gotten so high we were unable to see each others heads, we decided it was high time to disable the jets. It was kind of a Kodak Moment, but not really.

Phew, what a weekend that was.

We dumped our baby on Sadie who appeared to have no problem with her. Bailey really is very easy to manage as she has the amazing ability to busy herself.

Our other kids? Yeah. We gave them to Marie and Bryan. They finally got their first glimpse of the definition of chaos. Marie mentioned that about the time they attempted to bathe all the kids is the last time she remembered having her sanity with her. Kids getting out of the tub when they arent supposed to, running around the house naked and dripping wet. It would make a good movie. She was counting the hours to when she could dump them back on us. We were of course more then happy to take them.

I remember when I thought 3 kids was pure havoc. But its not so bad anymore. Judging by how Marie described her time with them, I can only come to the conlusion that me and Amy have gone insane, and what was once way out of line and disturbing, has now become a normal way of life for us.

So that was our uber-romantic 6 year anniversary. May yours be just as memorable.

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